Recipe for Success: Ramadhan Edition

Bismillah....

This afternoon I was surprised to see one of my ex classmate in University posted a status,

"Tonight is the beginning of the last 10 nights of Ramadhan. Are you ready?" 

I was like, "Really?" and started to count with my fingers the days that have passed. Wow~ That was really fast.... I should have done this sharing earlier, I feel. But then it'll never be too late to start. By the way this is something that can be done continuously even after Ramadhan is over.

يَا أَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ آمَنُواْ كُتِبَ عَلَيْكُمُ الصِّيَامُ كَمَا كُتِبَ عَلَى الَّذِينَ مِن قَبْلِكُمْ لَعَلَّكُمْ تَتَّقُونَ

"O you who have believed, decreed upon you is fasting as it was decreed upon those before you that you may become righteous" Al-Baqarah, 183

At the beginning of Ramadhan I shared a tadabbur reference that I found very informative at several Whatsapp groups. I'm not used to learn religion in Malay, but that document, I feel, will be useful to many people because it is in Malay, the content is concise and clear and it is linked to short videos that will further expound the juz' in discussion. I was shocked when one of the group member labeled me as being riya' (ostentatious)

I didn't really take it seriously and assumed that he probably was just joking hahaha then it dawned on me, what if that was said to someone who would find it hurtful or what if this kind of thought, afraid of being labeled as riya', becomes a wrong reason that prevent someone from sharing beneficial information?

لَا حَسَدَ إِلَّا فِي اثْنَتَيْنِ رَجُلٌ آتَاهُ اللَّهُ مَالًا فَسُلِّطَ عَلَى هَلَكَتِهِ فِي الْحَقِّ وَرَجُلٌ آتَاهُ اللَّهُ  

 الْحِكْمَةَ فَهُوَ يَقْضِي بِهَا وَيُعَلِّمُهَا

"There are no envy but in two cases: a man whom Allah has given wealth and he spends it rightly, and a man whom Allah has given wisdom and he judges and teaches with it" Sahih al-Bukhari

I believe sharing knowledge or useful materials of knowledge is healthy and is also a form of worship to Allah. Who knows, who else would benefit the sharing or perhaps there might also be someone out there who is  in dire need of the input. By the way, I actually wanted to share about Ramadhan journal hahaha

Alhamdulillah, I already started with mine. What instigated me was, I do had my random sessions of tadabbur and also been listening to my favourite scholars' talk every now and then... But I will easily and most of the time almost immediately forget the points hahaha I've been thinking of making my own notes, but having called it a  journal makes it sound more personal and warm hahaha

This is a blog post in Have Halal Will Travel on Quran journaling. And another one that inspired me to start this book was Neelofa's doa book that she shared during one of her IG live. 

This page that I shared with you is the notes I'd taken while listening to the tadabbur video in Yaqeen institute webpage. It is my most preferred site because one, it's FREE hahaha and the level of discussion suits my understanding capacity. There are also Bayyinah institute and Al Maghrib institute that offer both paid courses and some free materials. But most of the time, outside Ramadhan, it's easier to access the scholars talk from their personal facebook page and twitter. 

The page on the left is a hadith on kindness that was shared by Aida Azlin. So I'll also be writing down hadiths that resonate with me in this book.

This is the last few pages of the book where I wrote the 99 names of Allah for the exercise I shared on facebook. I made several realizations while putting my notes in. The first one being, I haven't been attentive to the meanings of asmaul husna in spite of having sang it since, I don't know, perhaps kindergarten. I just realized there's Al Maajid and Al Majeeed! Secondly, I have been 'shallow reading' the tafseer! Well, I did go into the asbab al-nuzul (the reasons behind the revelation) and the stories, but I've been for years taking it all in as it is rather than reflect on the deeper message. I was utterly amazed at how these scholars dissect the verses by kalimah, explained why that particular kalimah is chosen to convey the message, who was that message initially delivered to and finally how does it relate to our daily living in the modern days....

Okay I think that's all for now because I have something else to do... May the remaining days of Ramadhan this year brings us one step close to Allah, inshaAllah...

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Recipe: Char Kuey Teow

Bismillah...

It's been more than 2 weeks since my last update. Although there's actually not much to do at home, I haven't spared time to update this blog. How is your Ramadhan doing this year? As for me, Alhamdulillah, although it is very unusual for all of us to be stuck at home, being unable to perform the once a year Terawih in congregation, I actually found myself having more time to read books, for tadabbur and also engage in fruitful  discussions with close friends via Whatsapp. I also have tried quite a number of new recipes as what I'm going to share in several posts to come. I initially wanted to compile everything in one post, but then, for easier reference in the future, posting them separately will actually simplify the search in this blog hehehe

The original recipe is from this blog. The ingredients for the paste are:

1. Prawns (Peel off the skin and also take the head)

2. 2 tbsp Sweet Soy Sauce

3. 2 tbsp Oyster sauce

4. 1 Anchovies stock cube

5. 1 tbsp Chili paste (I made my own)

6. Garlic

Firstly, boil the prawn skin and head until they turned orange in colour like in the picture. 

And after that mince using a blender, sift the mixture and use the 'filtrate' to make the paste (ni mo tulis resipi ka chemical experiment ni hehe)

Mix all the ingredients into the saucepan and cook over a low flame. 

Leave it to simmer for about 30 minutes

After 30 minutes......

The ingredients needed to cook the Char Kuey Teow:

1. Kuey teow (Flat Noodle) 

2. Prawns

3. Bean sprouts

4. Chives

5. Garlic

6. Egg

Stir fry the garlic. Add in the paste and prawns. Then followed by the bean sprouts and chives. And finally, the egg.

Kacau kacau kacau... Dan siap!

My little brother liked it very much! Maksudnya sedap la tu hehehe

I'm still contemplating whether I should buy my own set of cookware. 

Huwaaaaa I have no space to keep them~

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COVID19 Diary #5

Bismillah

Alhamdulillah, Malaysia has been doing very well with handling the pandemic. New cases has been below 100 cases for the past 5 days. However, the MCO has been extended for another 2 weeks. It is for the best for the whole nation.

As for me, I'm just lazing around at home today. Something I voluntarily decide to because I'm currently having this mind clutter. It's not so much of stress, but more of information overload. The updates for Covid 19 is very rapid and massive. I literally have been reading medical journals on daily basis for the past 6 weeks to keep up. And I think taking in too much have made the inputs all mixed up, and confusing thus affecting the retention and retrieving process. So, today I want to relax my mind and devise a way to reorganize. 

I'm supposed to continue with my current read which is Michelle Obama's, Becoming. I'm progressing very slowly with this one; partly because it's a hard cover so it's not very convenient to bring around. But currently the weather is too hot to switch on the light in my room, so I resolved to writing. This, I think is better than opening the shopee app and start to browse for a reading light 😜

I've come to the part of the book where Michelle is trying to adapt with being a wife of a newly appointed senate. 

From the very beginning, Michelle's life sounds very familiar. Her childhood and youth, I think, resounds very much like ours who come from middle class families, whose parents are not in the professional category. She was faced with a greater challenge while growing up which is racism. But I think it was her parents who played the biggest role in ensuring she received the best of education and shaped her personality to become what she is today. 

"Behind every successful man, there's a lot of unsuccessful years" 

People only get to see the end product, but wouldn't know what that successful person went through to get there. It was not always rainbow for Michelle too. She failed her first bar exam, landed and stayed in a job that didn't give her satisfaction for many years because the pay was good, she had difficulty to conceive and she had marriage struggles too. 

She finally decide to leave her job at the acclaimed law firm for a job in the city hall for a post with a jobscope that is more aligned with her core values although her monthly earnings was reduced to half. She  then struggled to juggle between her career and motherhood. She felt the burden to raise the family was left on her shoulder when her husband started to be involved in politics. 

I think the thing she always do was seek help. She had mentors that she looked up to at every stage of her career path. I remember in one part, she described the women she was working with as, "They weren't striving for perfect, but managed somehow to be always excellent". And when she had marriage problem, she didn't dwell into self pity but seek for a counselling service instead and that worked well for them. 

As I leaf through the pages, I noticed that Michelle is someone who is highly adaptable and is not afraid to try something new even though it might threaten her identity. At the end of each of it, she became someone who is much much better, stronger and even readier for bigger things.

As I reach this stage of my life, I do agree even how eager I am for growth, progress and excellence, I always have fears when I am about to make each leap. Honestly, even at this age, I'm afraid to go abroad for studies because I've never been away to another continent for more than 3 weeks. But perhaps I'm just worried about losing who I am now if I were away somewhere doing something out of the current routine. Although my current goal seems quite out of my reach now since we are now living the 'new normalcy', I still havent give up, I still haven't put the idea aside but is making this pandemic to my advantage for experience. 

I also think Michelle is very lucky to have found a spouse who understands her big goals and has his even bigger goal. I like how they challenge, support and trust each other too. It was one of the things that I struggled with in my previous serious relationship that led to a irreconcilable differences. That's one of the reason why I've been avoiding relationships for the past 12 years (Slow clap, pats own shoulder lol); because I haven't found someone who is not intimidated and not feel emasculated by my thirst for challenges and excellence. I like how they commit to each other from the very beginning, because I too believe that by commiting to a secure relationship actually gives you the ability to focus on other things that matter in life. To me mind games and the inability to commit is mere distraction, exhausting and a waste of time. Not all women see marriage as their ultimate goal in life, the key to happily ever after and only then can they peacefully die. There are many women who wants to make the world a better place and I am one of them. 

I have never mentioned that actually one of the biggest influence in my life is my uncle that I called by the name Ucu. I meant to write about him so many times but haven't got the time to. Maybe in my next post I will because I've sooooooooooooo much time to write these days whenever I'm not working hahaha

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COVID19 Diary #4

Bismillah.. 

After series of failed Food Panda orders for the past 2 weeks, I dismissed the idea of ordering Sushi King until today. It was just a hunch to try it this afternoon. I chose the same menu that I craved for the past 2 weeks, tried the 50% voucher that I found in the internet, clicked order and it went through! At 3pm sharp, I met the Grab driver at the lobby entrance to collect my food!

Life works in mysterious ways.. Allah plans are always the best even at first it might not turn out like what we want it to be. But Allah knows better, have made my past transactions failed so I can save on my purchase today! Alhamdulillah...

I have made lots of plans for the year 2020. I've partially regretted the imbalance of 2019. I thought I would make amends to it, will make 2020 an even wonderful year and voilla our hopes and dreams of making 2020 an epic year has been jeo-covidized! 

It's really easy to be depressed these days as there is nothing much to look forward to. I, for once, love going to work more than 5 times a week so I can get my daily breath of fresh air. But when I look closely to what is happening in my life, again I realized that even amidst this pandemic, there are blessings in disguised and answered prayers. 

This year my calendar was mostly full with talk invitations, including one at a notable conference which actually surprised me. The outbreak here started a week before a program that I was chairing. We were all prepared, did our last touch and was only waiting for the day to come. The International Congress that was postponed in February made me restructure all my career plans and I had to restructure everything all over again because the entire world is currently on a lockdown, every country is solving the problem at different pace and basically we cannot project when this is going to be over and when everything will turn back to normal. My future is bleak and doomed... No, Im just kidding! hahaha well, there's a lot of uncertainties and what's approaching is very blurry, I wont deny that. But I can feel that I am walking the path I'm meant to walk... 

I'm looking at this as a platform for growth and learning. Never in my 10 years of working have I networked as much as I do in handling this pandemic. And with that come a lot of expectations and responsibilities. However. thanks to the nerve wrecking 2019, I've become a much tougher cookie. Perhaps Allah was actually preparing me emotionally for this. To keep my mental state in check is imperative because my tasks are endless and to let myself be consumed by emotion will only result in delays. I learned to study and analyse in great depth. I'm given the opportunity to help others learn too. And most recently I got the chance to be involved in a clinical trial. I guess, this is a good time for me to ask myself, "Haziah, do you have what it takes to become a specialist?" 

I've been using my free time to correspond with the people I met during my travels; just to check them out and to learn how their country is coping. A good friend whose country is listed among the poorest in the world told me a lockdown cannot be imposed because the people will be badly affected economically at his country. It got me thinking of how Malaysians are very blessed to have a government that implements loan relief for half a year, giving people the choice to reduce their EPF to fatten their savings and in addition to that receive financial aids!!!! I seriously can't understand why there are many people who thought the effort was not enough and unequal. 

When it comes to my financial, my chingus described me as "A T20 who lives like a B20" 😅 In reality, I'm a very frugal person despite my love for global trotting. I don't waste money on things that I don't need and I mostly spend only on my family, my travels and also my books. I rarely buy stuffs when it's not on discount, I'm a discount voucher hunter and I take care of my things really really well so I won't waste money on buying new ones. Nevertheless, saving is still a struggle because travelling is not cheap anyway hahaha I think this pandemic enables me to improve on my savings as well. I've been calculating how much would I need if I were to be on leave for studies and had thought it was near impossible to reach if I dont stop travelling. I only had 2 travel tickets for this year to meet my plans. But then since nobody is going nowhere, so the money goes into the bank! 

This pandemic also makes it even clearer of the little things that matters and necessary in life. The top of my list is of course my family. I found a status that says, "Nobody piss you off like the person you love, I swear they strike a different kimd of nerve." I swear I feel like yelling at my Dad because he always find an excuse to go out during this MCO. That would be as simple as buying a loaf of bread. He returned with nothing than just that. I really miss my family in our island. But they're coping well because we have a huge land and they've planted so many things already for the past 1 month. My mom sends videos almost every day to show what they planted. 

Serving my purpose, I feel, matters. When I was in school, I felt that it was important to score because it will make my parents proud. One day I will get a well paid job and will make them live life comfortably. That was a purpose I discovered at a young age. Today, my perspectives and priorities have evolved. Whatever role that I meant to play is my purpose and I should conduct them in excellence so that when my time ends I will have no regrets. I owe this to Nurul. She might have lived for a short 18 years, but she have done her duties well and I want that for myself too.

There is always the good side of everything... We just need to trust Allah more... Because He is writing a story that suits each one of us best 😘

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COVID19 Diary #3

Bismillah...

After the extension of MCO was announced, my Umie came to me and said she felt sorry that I have to work so hard while everybody else are staying at home. I was actually startled that I didn't know how to appropriately react. I told her, "I'm okay. Although I've been doing extra hours but actually I'm still okay."

It was only later that I figured that she might have expressed her worries after seeing the social media flooded with pictures of healthcare workers (HCW) working so hard to contain Covid19. A nurse, I heard, even broke down during an interview. Honestly, I've been avoiding social media as much as I can nowadays. To me, social media is like a dark place that misleadingly makes you think that most of the world population are senseless and earth is a horrible place to live in hahaha but I do scroll once in a while for my favourite TV show snippets, motivational videos, reliable news and also comedians that I'm following.


Like I said before, the effects of Covid19 to HCW are diverse but what I can say about the team that I'm working with, they are highly motivated and focused in solving the problem. What surprised me was that the people who are not directly dealing with Covid19 cases can be even more depressed for many reasons. Some are depressed because HCW has to go to work as usual while people in other fields can work in the comfort of their homes, some are consumed with intense jealousy because they are not entitled for extra allowances and there are also HCW who I feel, imprudently, condemned the people who they've pledged to care and protect. "A man will show his true colours in adversity", says an African proverb.


My friends and I were engaged on a lengthy discussion when we were unanimously frustrated that many of our counterparts, amidst this trying times, have gone extra mile to seek for recognition and even plead for extra payment while managing the pandemic. Pictures at workstations were amassed and posted with captions and hashtags that screamed to be noticed. I watched in disbelief and hit the 'unfollow' button on the page of a society that is supposed to uphold the professions' reputation. We've come into conclusion that not everybody enters the profession with the intention to serve. According to SJ, she once encountered a lady who admitted that she enrolled into the course just because it guarantees her a well paid job.


Life is all about perspective. What is happening now is unprecedented, everybody is forced to make sacrifices and perhaps act against what they are naturally inclined to. I'm one of the lucky ones who have found my passion in this career and an outbreak like Covid19 to me is when I should step forward and play my role to the fullest regardless whether I'm paid extra or not. Because practicing in ID simply means that I automatically shoulder the responsibility. It was tiring at first but after we've picked up with the whole process, things were smoother in our end. Keeping the team in high spirit is another challenge, but it is not something that I couldn't handle, Alhamdulillah. And most importantly, I've learned so many new things for the past few weeks and that ranges from human nature, managerial functions and medical updates as well as knowing myself better in this tough times.


One of the most important thing I learned is to hold firm to my own core values, not let it be shaken by noises of negativity and continue doing the things I feel right to win this battle against the unseen....

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