Nolobuh: 29 - 30 Dec 2018

Bismillah...

This was our closing trip for 2018 which was actually postponed too many times before due to several reasons. EVJ went there before and he was ecstatic when he got back and said that this is a must do. And after this trip, I definitely second that (^^)/

The starting point is Kg, Teritidon, Kota Belud. We started really early that morning. We were suppose to depart at 4 am but I mistakenly put my alarm clock on silent and only woke up at 3.30 am. All my isi isi steamboat were thawed but I needed to fry them first to make them last for the night. So there I was, with eyes half opened, grabbing the frying pan, turning on the stove, pouring the oil and then deep frying all the items. My dad was already up at that hour, waiting to go for congregational morning prayer at the masjid. I noticed him watching me in a curious look hahaha maybe he thought I was sleep walking or something hahaha

We stopped for morning prayer in Tuaran, arrived at the starting point at around 7am. I think we were on gravel road for about 45 minutes before arriving at the village. There, we registered, did some warm ups, given some briefing about the trail, the activities and safety and off we went!

NK was asking me before the trip whether the trail is strenuous. I confidently said "NO" because EVJ described it as "OK JAK". Truthfully, it was quite a challenge since we have loads on our backs and I  even had cramps (Cis bikin malu~). The first part of this trail was a long climb which I didn't expect. However, it's the clear path type, with no annoying stems and barks on top of you that you have to duck, or any fallen trees that you have to cross. So it was just the inclination that was a challenge. 

We arrived at the base camp at noon. We had with us some packed lunch, but EVJ went to cook some Maggi Laksa as well since he brought like 10 packets. I was surprised to see the facilities are actually convenient for a shed like this.

The water source was nearby, there was a proper toilet, they have a place for bonfire and the guides even have a vegetable garden next to the shed! They have pumpkins, chillis, ladies fingers, lemon grass etc. I enjoyed guessing just by looking at the leaves because most of them are not ready for harvest yet, not a single bud. I'm pretty good at it because I'm actually from a family that loves to garden.I don't like to get my hands dirty, though lol

The water source. I was a bit curious how the source was like and during our hike to the 'peak', we got the chance to see it. I don't have the picture of the 'technology' though but I was awed by the simplicity.

We slept on plastic sacks. No complains, I slept like a baby. I wasn't careful enough with the leeches! They came biting me at night because I didn't spray the repellent!

My favourite would be when we went caving that evening. I wished the activity was longer lol. We wade inside the water, enjoyed ourselves at this small waterfall inside the cave and there was a section where there were birds nests.

Personally, I think the activities were simple (ceyh padahal cramp kan hahaha)

But it might be challenging to those who are not water confident, who are uncomfortable with being  in dark, small spaces and those with weak upper body strength since there were a bit rock climbing involved.

The next morning we went for a short hike to the peak that overlook the majestic Mount K.

I've been keeping this post for too long in the draft, so I keep it short and sweet hahaha

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Short Stories...

Bismillah....

I was waiting for my luggage at the conveyor belt when my phone rang that morning. The phone screen showed an unsaved number. I don't usually answer calls from unfamiliar numbers. But since I thought it was too early for scam or credit card calls, I decided to answer it anyway just in case it was something important.

At the end of the line, I heard a lady's voice that I didn't immediately recognize. It was either because  her voice was abnormally raspy at that hour or I was still blurry from the long flight. The call was actually from one of my best friend, RM, calling me to confirm about our best friend's dad demise the night before. "I have no idea. I just arrived. I'm going to ask around and get back to you." And the news was indeed true.

What happened to JF made me thought a lot about my relationship with my parents. How I've grown so much and at times forgot that they are getting older too. Have I made them happy and proud? Have I played my role as a daughter well? Have I fulfilled their needs and wants? I don't know the answers... Or perhaps Allah purposely have made the answers to those questions immeasurable so we will never stop doing the best we can until the time is up.

******

A best friend in Uni once told me, "When things go wrong, always reflect on the initial Niat. And from there decide whether it's worth choosing the easiest exit or keep going.."

It seems like the path for my career advancement was made easy since the day I decided what I want to do in a long run in this profession. The right courses were unexpectedly offered to me. I was introduced to the right people: inspiring ones, those with good connections etc. I was without any doubt made to believe that I will not be faced with any obstacle that will deter my dream. I was terribly wrong.

What I was facing was something that affect how I feel inside rather than a stumbling block that can be solved and removed. I was demotivated to an extend that I feel like I need to just walk away and try something else. But, Alhamdulillah, I got to my senses and thought that this is just one of the first challenge on this path and if I cant withstand this one, how can I thrive until I get to where I intended to be?


*******

It was a temperate December evening, and she was already late. As she pace hurriedly towards where her friends were waiting, she felt like a pair of eyes were tailing her every steps from afar. She stopped, turned to look if it was someone she knew. There he was sitting alone on the bench with his fingers interlocking, still clad in his office wear. He was someone she knew by name but not in person. Their eyes met. She forced a smile. When it was not returned, she turned in embarrassment and start walking towards where she was originally headed. "Weird guy!" she mumbled under her breath. Little did she knew that night that he was going to be her kryptonite.

She already seen it too many times, still it felt the same. There was never fast heartbeat, just a sudden rush of happiness and calmness every time she sees him smile. A mystery, she thought. That evening, as she gazed at the horizon before her where the icy mountains met the blue sky, her thoughts drifted to him. "Where ever he is right now, O Allah, may he always be well in Your Protection and be prosperous in what he does..."

Kryptonite...

"So tell me, what is it about him that makes him such an exception?" her best friend provoked.
"I can't come up with a single reason, actually. Is that weird?"

She had the right reason to be mad that night. But when she had the chance to, she asked "So tell me, how was it..?" instead

To her, it is love that blooms out of nowhere and without a clear reason. To her, he is not obliged to reciprocate. She knows very well, at this point of her life she wants a man who wants a future together, who sees her as a mother to his children and nothing less. Perhaps this love is another gift that she has to cherish. Everything that is meant for her, will finally be hers and if this is not it, it will fade.. Eventually..

As she walks away.. she still wonder.. How can she love so selflessly...
What a mystery~

******

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Kaka GG Favourite Products

Bismillah...

I think MR will find this post cute hahahaha she has been receiving free products for review so I'm kind of inspired to make one post on my current favourite products too. I've always been one of the most beauty conscious among my friends since school years. It's just not obvious because I played it cool (I think..) Unless you spend at least one night in the same room with me, you will never know kahkahkahkah OK here goes...

1. Nella Honey Snail Ultra Moisture Cream (100 g)

THIS IS MY HOLY GRAIL!!!! I was searching for a good night cream after I finished using my Innisfree Green Tea Sleeping Pack and I didn't know which one to choose. I prefer a product that is cheap because I usually don't find buying a more expensive one is of any additional value. Snail based products are generally well known for their excellent moisturizing effect and this one was cheap, the size was relatively huge than others in the market and the reviews were promising.

It cost me RM 39 in Althea. I'm very satisfied with the result. It kept my skin moisturized until the next morning I woke up. And even though it is quite thick and slimy at first, but once you apply it evenly on your skin, you barely feel anything because it is so well absorbed. The thing is it doesn't come with a spatula and of course I have my own. But I'm not very comfortable with opening the container too frequently while there is still a lot of it inside, so I transferred a small amount into a 30g container and will only top it up once it is finished. To minimize contamination, kunun hehehe

2. Misha Perfect Cover BB Cream

Yes, I wear make up in the morning and will look horrific after Zuhur prayer because I wont reapply it hahaha This is actually my second purchase; I bought the first one in Seoul last year. I wasn't looking for anything in particular at that time. I just need a BB cream to replace my old one which was a French product I got from SaSa. MR was the one who told me this one was one of the reviewers favourite so I gave it a try.

Depending on my mood, I usually will apply the make up base first before the BB cream. This way, it will be more even, doesn't caked in air conditioned room and lasting. The coverage is okay but not as good as the Naturactor. I manage to compare because my BFF uses that. I like the natural look it gives that's why I thought this is here to stay!

3. The Falsie Push Up Angel, Maybeline

I don't wear this every day, of course. It's waterproof. I only wear this during 'that time of the month' because if I don't it will just expire on my shelf. I don't have good mascara wearing skills so this one gets its plus point because it does not clump no matter how clumsy the user is hahaha. And it doesn't feel heavy and sticky on my lashes which most mascara do.

4. It's Skin Face Serum

My all-time favourite serum. It's really cheap. It used to cost only RM 25 (30 ml) but I guess due to the high demand now it is RM 30 to RM 35, depending on the type. I tried quite a number and I loved them all! Currently the one on my shelf is the GF type for moisturizing and brightening effect. And I use the VE type at night which is for antioxidant anti aging effect. Takut betul la bha kan aging hahaha

5. Mise-En-Scene Perfect Hair Serum

I don't know how others who wear hijab take care of their hair, but I'm the pretty obsessed type even when my hair is actually covered most of the time. One time, I went to this hair saloon that had a Muslimah area and the price they offered was cheap. A few people recommended so I was influenced. But, that end up with the worst haircut I ever got.. EVER.. It was such a sore sight that I went to a proper hair stylist the next day to get it fixed immediately even when that meant I had to pay 3x the amount I paid for that WORST HAIRCUT EVER..

The first thing I do when I wake up is.. Fix my hair~ That's what I answered in one the IG story template thingy..

So back to the product, it claimed to have 7 kinds of oil; Argan, Camelia, Marula, Olive, Jojoba, Coconut and Apricot Oil. So what it does is it smoothens and strengthens the hair. I find it really does as what was claimed. and I think the best part would be it doesn't leave your hair greasy.

6. CP 1 Raspberry Hair Vinegar

This one is one of the most best selling item and is always out of stock whenever I want to purchase one. I finally get to purchase it in October! 

The key ingredients of this product; Raspberry vinegar extract, peppermint leaf extract and olive oil. It is used exactly like a conditioner. Apply after shampooing, massage to get it evenly spread (not sure if that's a correct term) and leave it for a few minutes before washing it off. It strengthen the hair, makes it more elastic and lustrous and yasssss it works the magic for me!


I think I posted before, I've been pretty adherent with my regime so that's the reason why I can see the results hahaha so kalau tidak istiqomah, nda jugak tu ada effect :p


"Biar 30s and single.. Yang penting Gorgeous~" Haziah Salleh, Dec 2018

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Medical Camp: Pensiangan 23-25 November 2018

Bismillah...

This is my 8th year of service, and this is my very first involvement in a Medical Camp in Sabah! Finally!! \(^^)/

I received last minute offers many times before but I usually have something else scheduled that I have to decline. And for this one, Alhamdulillah, I had an offer on the same day that I turned down another offer to the same place.

Honestly, I was really really excited. Was asking around about this part of interior Sabah from those who went there before. Googled the map and details of the people. I was not even sure of what to wear and was stalking other people's IG to see what they wore to Medical Camp on the night I packed my stuffs. Adui.. Budak bandar konon~ Hahaha

I woke up early on that day and asked my Dad to drive me to the hospital. Our departure was delayed by a few hours due to some transport arrangement issues but I was okay to have arrived early. One of my resolution this year is to improve on punctuality. And I had the chance to study some Japanese while waiting.

We rode an air-conditioned van to Keningau.. I have to mention this because after that we were stuffed in a non AC van for another 3 hours to reach KK Nabawan and then to a village where we shift to a 4WD vehicle. I saw one of the volunteer posted on her IG story "There are 17 of us is this non AC van!" hahaha It was not the most comfortable ride but since I've experienced worst so I was actually okay. At least the ventilation was okay and the road was not bumpy although my legs were not in a comfortable position. Amazingly, AJ manage to fall asleep and the rest of us were occasionally engaged in small talks throughout the journey.

We were the last to arrive and the villagers were already waiting to get their medications. It was quite frantic that evening. Maybe because how the tables were arranged. I guess, those who arrived earlier had set them up in a hurry too. We had to speak loudly to make sure we were heard by our patient; I was struggling because my voice is not the loud type LOL I had no picture of that commotion. Thank God because I'm sure I'll be ugly if there is any hahaha That night we joined the others to pack some gifts and stationery for the kids. And this room on top wass where we spent our night at the first village. I think it was comfortable and I had a good night sleep.

Second day with Dr Emma who came all the way from Serdang to join us serve the people in Pensiangan. We started at around 8 am that morning. The table arrangement was improved so the flow was smoother that morning. At around 11 am, EVJ and LH left to the next village by boat leaving AJ and me. AJ kept on saying "Syukur nyeeeee GG yang tulis~" because she went on and on and on about both of the guys' undecipherable hand writing hahaha

It took around 30 minutes to the next village by boat. I was surprised to see there were strong rapids as we cruise on the river. It got me a bit worried for a while, wondering if the boat can pass them safely. Well it did, Alhamdulillah. There were times when the water splashed and we cheered in excitement. The guy sitting in front turned and asked "First time ke?" hahaha Naaaah~ we're just the type who easily get excited that things will seem like it's our first time every time hahaha

There were fewer patients at the second village that evening. The weather was a bit too hot for me that I was actually trying my best to bear a bad headache throughout the afternoon. Around 4 pm, we went to check our accommodation for that night. I was fast asleep while the rest went to explore the village. Only got hold of PCM later that night and finally it got better. They had some activity at the church but I didn't go and were just chatting with the other girls. EVJ and LH went to play cards with another group of NGO that was there to install solar panels. hurm.. Nampak sangat ketuaan aku kan dalam kisah ini~

We started around 9 am on our last day. Actually, the dentist was the hottest spot of all. We really pity him to have single-handedly handled all the patients in both village. He pulled like more than 40 teeth in a day! 

We left the village at around 12 something that afternoon and our journey upstream took twice the duration downstream. We even stopped to get some fuel midway. There was this other boat that was smaller and the engine was only like 15 horsepower (based on what was printed on the engine). I was observing it every time it was nearby because the way it got drifted away every time it tried to push on against the current was actually horrific! I was like, "Oh My God~ I'm happy I'm not on that boat.."

Cute baby~

The awesome team we worked with! 

One of them is the nurse in my ward who invited me to join along

There is a nurse I played futsal with

And one of them is a nurse I met in India in 2016!!!!! 

Someone in this picture is kind of an Insta Famous and we were stoked when we found out hahahaha

and then we decided to add his number of followers hahaha

Oh that's just me.. In a rare good candid pic hahaha

Smile and salam kiddo!

Mesti aku tengah mengarut ngarut dengan budak ni masa ni

I'm so grateful to have been given the opportunity to experience this :)

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Why I Decided To Quit Facebook~

Bismillah...

Life has been really really hectic for the past few weeks that I finally decided to quit Facebook after 9 years! Hahaha I was having a not so amazing day and that evening when I finally got the time to lie down, have my own time to unwind, I decided to see what was up on Facebook.


Honestly, despite having frequent posts on Facebook, I was not an active 'newsfeed stroller' for the past 3 years. My posts were mostly directly shared from IG. I only open my FB page through my phone browser once or twice a day to see if there was anything that I should reply to. Visit some of the comedian or inspirational pages if I feel like I need some dose of humour or motivation. And occasionally 'stalk' random people that crossed my mind just to see how they are doing in life these days.

So that evening, when I was scrolling my newsfeed there were...

Resentful remarks on the current political situation and I was like, "Oh c'mon! Why can't these people just move on!"

And then there were some invitations to sign petitions. I end up looking up on the issues that I later found was emotionally disturbing

And some disturbing news on child abuse and marriage problems

And then there were the regular showoffs

And then I went,
"Ok Haziah.. I think we just made our not so amazing day from bad to worse... We don't need this now and ever..."

Took me some time to find the deactivation button since the browser version is not as user friendly. But I finally did it! I ticked the 'I don't find FB useful' at the reason for the deactivation and then there was this pop up that suggested how to make FB useful and I was like, "I've made up my mind.. Zuckerberg will still be a wealthy chap if I leave~ Lalalala"


FB used to be fun; it did connect me with some long lost friends and with those I met during my travels. When my friends list were just those people who knew me in real life, I used to posts a lot of crap because these people knew it was just that;  'CRAP!'. I used to love posting the quotes that I agreed to, deep thoughts that crossed my mind through my observations, phrases from books etc. I stopped because acquaintances were like, "Why are you so emo on FB?"

I was not emo. It was just quotes that I found wise. And I just don't get it, why contemplating my surrounding and writing them into words is emo? Fine! Maybe because I'm not Yasmin Mogahed or Lang Leav or Najwa Zebian etc.


So far, I don't feel like I'm missing anything. None of the viral stuffs really matter anyway other than causing annoyance. And I really don't like it when the excessive sharing on negative stuffs gives you the idea that this world is a bad place to live in. There are still so many beauty, hopes and kindness in this world; why are they not being highlighted as much as the negative stuffs.


Well, life is not always rainbow for me too, but I have countless other blessings that can make me curve a smile at the end of each day.

Do I feel like I'm disconnected from my close friends that live far from me?

To think of it, I have their phone numbers anyway. I realized that browsing through their page, looking at their current pictures are not 'real connection'. 'Real connection'  is when we really contact them, interact with them and ask how's life. Looking at their pictures will make us assume a lot of things that might not be true. Well, some posts might trigger contact but... yeah it's okay. I know I can maintain my connection with people who really matter.

And there's a particular person that feel more and more like a stranger whenever I see his posts and I don't like that feeling.

To sum it all, I guess FB is another thing that I 'decluttered' from my life for a peace of mind.
The world is still a beautiful place, and I'm not going to let people shroud me from that fact.
I'm not totally disconnected from the people that matter to me, because in reality I can always reach them even without FB and I know they can reach out to me too.
And a person who really wants you will pursue you, will make it clear, won't make you second guess and not having FB will not stop what's already written from happening. Have faith in Allah for He knows what's best :)

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