Bismillah..
After series of failed Food Panda orders for the past 2 weeks, I dismissed the idea of ordering Sushi King until today. It was just a hunch to try it this afternoon. I chose the same menu that I craved for the past 2 weeks, tried the 50% voucher that I found in the internet, clicked order and it went through! At 3pm sharp, I met the Grab driver at the lobby entrance to collect my food!
Life works in mysterious ways.. Allah plans are always the best even at first it might not turn out like what we want it to be. But Allah knows better, have made my past transactions failed so I can save on my purchase today! Alhamdulillah...
I have made lots of plans for the year 2020. I've partially regretted the imbalance of 2019. I thought I would make amends to it, will make 2020 an even wonderful year and voilla our hopes and dreams of making 2020 an epic year has been jeo-covidized!
It's really easy to be depressed these days as there is nothing much to look forward to. I, for once, love going to work more than 5 times a week so I can get my daily breath of fresh air. But when I look closely to what is happening in my life, again I realized that even amidst this pandemic, there are blessings in disguised and answered prayers.
This year my calendar was mostly full with talk invitations, including one at a notable conference which actually surprised me. The outbreak here started a week before a program that I was chairing. We were all prepared, did our last touch and was only waiting for the day to come. The International Congress that was postponed in February made me restructure all my career plans and I had to restructure everything all over again because the entire world is currently on a lockdown, every country is solving the problem at different pace and basically we cannot project when this is going to be over and when everything will turn back to normal. My future is bleak and doomed... No, Im just kidding! hahaha well, there's a lot of uncertainties and what's approaching is very blurry, I wont deny that. But I can feel that I am walking the path I'm meant to walk...
I'm looking at this as a platform for growth and learning. Never in my 10 years of working have I networked as much as I do in handling this pandemic. And with that come a lot of expectations and responsibilities. However. thanks to the nerve wrecking 2019, I've become a much tougher cookie. Perhaps Allah was actually preparing me emotionally for this. To keep my mental state in check is imperative because my tasks are endless and to let myself be consumed by emotion will only result in delays. I learned to study and analyse in great depth. I'm given the opportunity to help others learn too. And most recently I got the chance to be involved in a clinical trial. I guess, this is a good time for me to ask myself, "Haziah, do you have what it takes to become a specialist?"
I've been using my free time to correspond with the people I met during my travels; just to check them out and to learn how their country is coping. A good friend whose country is listed among the poorest in the world told me a lockdown cannot be imposed because the people will be badly affected economically at his country. It got me thinking of how Malaysians are very blessed to have a government that implements loan relief for half a year, giving people the choice to reduce their EPF to fatten their savings and in addition to that receive financial aids!!!! I seriously can't understand why there are many people who thought the effort was not enough and unequal.
When it comes to my financial, my chingus described me as "A T20 who lives like a B20" 😅 In reality, I'm a very frugal person despite my love for global trotting. I don't waste money on things that I don't need and I mostly spend only on my family, my travels and also my books. I rarely buy stuffs when it's not on discount, I'm a discount voucher hunter and I take care of my things really really well so I won't waste money on buying new ones. Nevertheless, saving is still a struggle because travelling is not cheap anyway hahaha I think this pandemic enables me to improve on my savings as well. I've been calculating how much would I need if I were to be on leave for studies and had thought it was near impossible to reach if I dont stop travelling. I only had 2 travel tickets for this year to meet my plans. But then since nobody is going nowhere, so the money goes into the bank!
This pandemic also makes it even clearer of the little things that matters and necessary in life. The top of my list is of course my family. I found a status that says, "Nobody piss you off like the person you love, I swear they strike a different kimd of nerve." I swear I feel like yelling at my Dad because he always find an excuse to go out during this MCO. That would be as simple as buying a loaf of bread. He returned with nothing than just that. I really miss my family in our island. But they're coping well because we have a huge land and they've planted so many things already for the past 1 month. My mom sends videos almost every day to show what they planted.
Serving my purpose, I feel, matters. When I was in school, I felt that it was important to score because it will make my parents proud. One day I will get a well paid job and will make them live life comfortably. That was a purpose I discovered at a young age. Today, my perspectives and priorities have evolved. Whatever role that I meant to play is my purpose and I should conduct them in excellence so that when my time ends I will have no regrets. I owe this to Nurul. She might have lived for a short 18 years, but she have done her duties well and I want that for myself too.
There is always the good side of everything... We just need to trust Allah more... Because He is writing a story that suits each one of us best 😘
