About to leave...

I'm currently sitting on my "deformed" bed.. Thanks to my not-so-brilliant action that it is now in its condition.


My eyes are alternately looking out through my window and the computer screen searching for inspiration of what to write.. This post has been hovering in my mind box for a few days now but I had to refrain myself from writing to focus on exam... I would like this post to really come from the bottom of my heart...


About to leave...


My room is overlooking a hill that is covered with lushest greenery.. It's a scene that I everyday watch especially during lunch.. With earphones snugged in both ears, I found tranquility from watching the scenery outside my window.. This inner peace allow me to think clearer..

It's the same setting that I watch everytime at dawn (around 3-4 am) only that the surrounding is dark.. I easily wake up at those time, I don't know why.. Some say it's because I was born around that time.. But whenever I woke up I tend to open my window... What I saw outside is like magic...


Everything is so still and there is always the melodic sounds of nocturnal animals.. Sometimes when the surrounding is lit by the full moon (like a few days ago) the surrounding just seem to sparkle... Rumi was right when he said "The breeze at dawn has secrets to tell you~"


This is what I'm about to leave in a few days...
4 years seem to be so long, but now when the end is almost approaching, everything just seem like yesterday... There may be memories that I would love to erase but I can say that the 4 years were really the time where I learn a lot about life... Life was like a telenovela with each of us as the main actor and actress of our own drama..


There were joys and laughters...
There were sadness and resentment..
There were kindness and care...
There were feud and betrayal...
There were teamwork...
There were forgiveness and reconciliation...

We did not only sweat to colour the result slip with satisfying numbers but we also struggle to defend friendship, to uphold dignity and to make every day brighter than before.


I'm grateful to those who had had the courage to give me constructive critics.. Especially the ones about my awful time management, my fragile conscience when it comes about my tragic love story.. Thanks for guiding me to become wiser, for giving me strength to choose the right thing in life and for helping me "unlove" or is it "delove" someone that I thought I would marry one day..


Hurm.. 4 years is just too long for the people here to see all my flaws.. I think they seen it all.. So here I would like to thank everybody for accepting me for who I am.. For forgiving for all that I did wrong.. For earnestly being there for me when I was most in need.. There might be some "sorries" that were unsaid, so for the wrong doings of mine that were intentionally done or not, I am truly very sorry... I wish to leave pleasant foot steps in your life and not 'muddy' ones





O yeah~ I'm also well aware that there are too many kindness from these people here that I might not be able to give anything in return.. I just want to let you know that I appreciate every single thing done for me.. For any act of kindness that any of you have impart, I wish that some day the same is given to you and the best is there'll be reward from our Creator, InshaAllah~


To leave is a mix of joy and fear.. Joyful that I finally finish my quest for knowledge.. Fearful for not being able to foresee how is life going to be later.. All the time spent here was a net of gains and loss.. Some loss were good, some loss were resentful but I'm in hope that the gains will be enough to prepare me to face the challenges of the real world.. But I'm all aware one of life's rule which is "to learn, unlearn and relearn"there are more things to learn out there...



To think about it, the Haziah that walked in 4 years ago is not going to walk out as the same person..