For Moms, Moms-to-be and Aunts~ Motivating Kids to LEARN

End of study and being unemployed is BORING~ Most of us are engaged with our computers and I chat with my friends everyday.. Well, this is basically because I'm currently in my dad's house where I have lesser roles but one similar thing that I've to deal with here and at mom's place are LAZY KIDS!!!!


..who would bable hundreds of excuses to avoid from doing their homework..

..who would tell you that their wrists are burning from writing a few lines of words..

..who would start talking about what fun things they did in school a few minutes after the study session is commenced..

Idham is my stepmom's nephew who's staying with us througout weekdays to attend school. The house seem to be a lot noisier and merrier since he's around because he sure talks a lot for a 5 year old and he always pretend to be someone who's know-it-all.. Very cute indeed...


But it's tiring when it comes to doing his homework..You'll have to sit there beside him and watch him do it.. And if the teacher give some words to write, then you'll have to say the letters one by one to make him write them.. So lets say the word APPLE.. There are 5 letters and he has to write it 20 times so you'll have to spell the word for him for 20 times!!!! And believe me, everyday, there are like 5 words to write and there I go spelling them over and over again...

I've always been one of those who is very theoretical and factual so guess what.. I googled on how to deal with lazy kids and how to motivate them to learn.. So here goes the points that I extracted from my search~

1. Fill the child's world with reading.. This does not only mean to jam-packed the home with story books, novels, flash cards with words etc. but also to provide a time to read for them or a
time where the whole family read their own book.. Well, this will tell the child that reading and learning are important and most probably the child will be habituated to reading and learning too

2. Encourage them to express their opinion and make their own decision..

3. Don't ever deprive the child from playing because it's part of their development.. Instead, enrich the play with materials that support learning


4. Be enthusiastic towards the child's interest and encourage the child to explore more regarding the things that fascinate him

5. Ask the child what he learn in school and get him to teach you what he'd learnt. Ask relevant questions to make him think on his own. Moreover, this will help him to remember things easier.

6. Celebrate achievements no matter how small it is. This will encourage the child to improve from time to time

Well, i've been giving bribe like chocolates and sweets to make him increase the speed of his writing. I don't know for how long he'll buy that but according to my cousin who's studying children psychology, the child will one day be bored and it will no longer work.. So I guess I'll have to think of some other ways to make him more intrigued to learn.. I guess these tips will just do.. hehe

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Happy Mother's Day (^^)

I'm in mommy's office right now. They just opened this free cyber cafe here for youths to make good use of it. But since it's public holiday today so I can use this for as long as I want hehe

Well, I'm just dropping by to wish my mommy

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY...

I am what I am today because of you and

I LOVE YOU VERY MUCH!!!!!!!!!

I read somewhere in the internet that there are some views in Islam that are against Mother's day. But there was one opinion that says, it's ok to celebrate Mother's day as long as that we bear in mind that our mothers deserve love and respect every day as we breathe and live~

"We have enjoined on man kindness to his parents; in pain did his mother bear him, and in pain did she give him birth" (Al Ahqaf:15).

A man came to the Prophet and said, ‘O Messenger of God! Who among the people is the most worthy of my good companionship? The Prophet said: Your mother. The man said, ‘Then who?' The Prophet said: Then your mother. The man further asked, ‘Then who?' The Prophet said: Then your mother. The man asked again, ‘Then who?' The Prophet said: Then your father.

(Bukhari, Muslim).

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Beauty~

Much have been said about beauty.. Being beautiful... Even one of my buddy posted about 'Cantik' in her blog recently.. There's like this force within me that keeps on tugging my sleeve to also write about my views on beauty.. So here goes...


What I always believe is "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder" since it is very subjective. We have our own measure in evaluating and deciding what's beautiful and what's not but what's for sure is there are inner beauty and outer beauty

Outer beauty..


..is undeniably skin deep.. This is when appearance, looks and features are concerned.. Most say that it is not that important compared to inner beauty. My say, yes it is not that important but it matters.. When I say it matters I don't mean that we are to transform ourselves into looking like what the media tells us to look like~ hot smoking body, slender long legs, dazzling eyes, voluminous shiny hair etc Well, it's gratifying to have all that but what I mean is appearance that portray cleanliness, health and that we are comfortable in our own skin..


I believe in conserving what we already have. So what's important to me is to care, to protect, to rejuvenate and to nourish the outer beauty so it won't easily fade or lost. Actually it doesn't need hard work, it just need to be a habit.. It doesn't mean having cucumber on both eyes and a green pasty mask all over the face every night.. Daily facial cleansing, a decent shower, a diet that consist of variety of food plus fruits and vegetables and regular exercise might just ameliorate the God-given beauty created on us. His creation are all beautiful..

.

Inner beauty...

..is even more subjective... Well, let me tell you what's my definition...


..is when we look or mingle with this person, the beauty seems to be radiating to all those around.. Makes you feel beautiful yourself while receiving her smile, gaze, words, touch and company.. Makes us feel the alluring charm though she is not in the striking-look stock.. She is also able to waft radiant aura into the atmosphere...

Yeah~ In short, I think inner beauty is the summation of great personality and good intentions.. To me it's not innate, it's learned and will come naturally after lots and lots of improvement and practice over time.


Hurm.. Do you know where I find a definite inner beauty? I always see it in a loving and caring mother. The feeling is so natural. Even the touch of wrinkled hands seem to have the magic to caress a stranger's heart.. I guess it's the gift from the devotion towards loving her children and a life well-lived to serve those around..


I pity those who'd chosen to go under the knife to make them feel better about themselves.. I won't say they're out of their mind or what because there must be an intense pressure there that they finally decided to endure all the pain just to look beautiful and be accepted.

All in all, to me everybody are beautiful.. you, she, her, they, us... No matter if you are small and short (that's me) or if you are way off from the societal definition of 'beautiful', we are all unique. And this uniqueness if appreciated and taken care of and added with all the good personalities then you'll have the power to really rock the world!!! Feel good about yourself because there's no one out there who is the same as you.. And.. Don't forget to wear your sparkling smile at all times because you just don't know whose life is about to change for the better from looking at it..

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Words and Music~ make a beautiful SONG~

I just read in one of my favourite authors' blog about how art can convey deep messages and build connection to human being.. How a masterpiece is designed to fill the abyss that plagued human's souls which in turn abate discontent and life without purpose...


He narrated it so beautifully that I can't help but agree... To me, art is a creative way of telling those around you how you feel and how things are from your perspective. May it be a painting, a sculpture, a melody or a poem, if the artist really put his or her heart into building it plus talent, they'll have the ability to make spirits soar, touch hearts and the least they would ignite forceful thoughts~


I always wish to have such creative talent to convey what I feel and perceive in my own unique way~ I'm so awed by people like Adam Young who came up with his Owl City music project from his insomniac nights.. Like Mitch Albom and Paulo Coelho whose writing are so mesmeric that it could spark something deep within.. Or like Jimmy Page or John Lennon who are known amongst the best musician of the last century whose masterpiece are like unfading treasures.. And o yeah~ Yusuf Islam a.k.a Cat Stevens.. His music and lyrics before and after he embrace Islam are all timeless~


Hurm... this is a song that I found a few weeks ago.. It was released last year and yeah I'm late~ haha but that's okay.. Now I want you to listen to it and grasp whatever the lyrics want to tell~


>

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The guy who made me cry~

I'm currently writing this in the dark while the rest of my family members are asleep here in the living room. It's only around 11 pm right now but I know, we've worked so hard throughout the day to prepare for the kenduri arwah which was after maghrib.. It was exhausting...



The only reason why I'm not asleep yet is not because I'm too energetic of a young lady or what.. But I forgot to bring my blanket and the chill in this wooden house is seriously piercing through my muscles and bones... This is much colder than when you turn your air-con to the lowest degree..





The guy who made me cry...



I'm here in my kampung for the kenduri arwah of my late grandfather, 'nenek'... I expected myself to cry due to the awkward absence of the guy whom I love so much especially since I was the only one who couldn't make it to his funeral in January. But today, I actually cried for a different reason...

This guy.. Fate has it that he was born in an impoverished family where the wages of both his parents were not enough to serve all their 11 children that finally he, the youngest of all, was left here in Sabah for the relatives to take care. He was raised by different mothers.

This evening he said to me "Kak, aku ada 5 orang mak.. Bila aku panggil 'mak' semua menjawab~" *"Sis, I've 5 moms.. When I called out "mom" all of them answered"


I laughed because that exactly happened in the kitchen when he called out "mak". I said,

"Semua orang sayang kau kan, dik..."




Yeah~ Everybody love him very much.. When he was 9, he was entrusted to take care of nenek. They live all by themselves here in this kampung.. They mutually fulfill each other's needs. He helped out nenek with heavy chores like fetching water, carrying heavy things, washing clothes while nenek cook for him. He even had odd jobs in the market after school and during weekends. He receive tips from carrying fruits like watermellon, pineapples, honey dew and many more. O yeah~ Since he didn't have any bike, he walk to the market which is located around 1 km from the house.. Not that he didn't get money from the rest of the family members, it's just that he wanted to work and tried not to rely on others...


But when nenek fell really ill, they were seperated and like the rest of his cousins he only had the chance to meet nenek when there's occasions like eidul fitr or eidul adha~ Nenek was then taken care by another aunt..

The occasion that made me cry...

Just now, in the living room, as usual the imam was reciting quranic verses.. When it came to a point where the verses were not familiar to the jemaah and the jemaah went silent, I heard another voice that was precisely reciting every word that came from the imam.. The voice was mellow and soft .. Definitely from a boy.. I turned to my aunt and asked whose voice was it.. She simply answered with a smile "Adik.."


I went to peek for confirmation and yes there he was.. Cross-legged, holding a book in his hands and reciting.. He recited the verses clearly and I found it was rather amusing to see a tiny guy with such confidence in the crowd of adult men.. I smiled with tears pooling in my eyes.. One is because I'm so grateful that he has grown into such a lovely boy and secondly I could sense the love in his face and his voice.. I don't know how to correctly describe what I sense in the vibration of his voice but it's as if he really hopes that every verses and every prayers is heard by Allah (well, He'll definitely hear) and you can feel it how he miss the old man very much~

After the recitation was done, he stood up to help out carry the food into the living room..The other kids in his age were only staring and waiting including my overly-pampered brother..

I told ummi how amazed I was by adik tonight and she told me "Masa nenek kau meninggal.. Nda berenti dia baca yassin.. Sedap lagi tu dia baca.. Betul lagi makhraj dengan tajwid nya~"


Owh~ adik... You've made me cry tonight... All those hardships that you went through have made you like a polished gem even in this very young age~ Hope you score your UPSR this year and continue to grow as a nice lovely soleh guy... Ameen~

hurm~ he reminds me of someone else to0~ =)

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Marriage.. Things that I would like to ask 'the man'... hahaha

Ok~ Actually I don't know what's the most suitable title for this one.. But I want it to be as catchy as possible.. hehe


What brought me to this post..? Well, as a fresh graduate, it is well known that the hottest issue besides our future career is marriage which is another stepping stone to a whole new world.. As the graduation was approaching, may it be silently or explicitly, each of us were actually either considering, accepting, rejecting and making proposals...

So one night a best buddy came to me and confessed she'd just accepted a marriage proposal.. Well being in this kind of situation before, my response to her was more compose haha I freaked out of course but subsequent to that, we did a heart to heart talk where we share opinions and I gave her some questions that arise in me when considering a man to become a husband.. So here goes!!!!


What do you expect from me as a wife??

A man's expectation is of pivotal importance! (ayat skema physical pharm) Why do I want to know this in advance?? Because then it'll be easier for me to tell him the things that might need some time for him to see in me.. I want him to understand that some things might need some practice to make us to be accustomed to it...


Would you respect my other responsibilities??

Em... this is somewhat a big issue.. I've heard husbands who doesn't allow their wives to go back to their family's home.. To be honest, this is something that I can't understand and most probably can't tolerate with.. To me a husband should understand that a woman also have the responsibility as a child to her parents and should be tolerant in that terms.. A husband should respect the folks who'd brought up the woman he love and in return should also give the best to her parents.. As a symbol of gratitude maybe~

I really love if the husband understand the commitment that the wife have to give on the career too.. In this era, I think that both have to work to maintain financial stability..


How do you see yourself as a husband??

Aha! this is one tricky question for the guy... Well, his answers for this question is not expected to be conclusive. This question is just to give the rough idea of how he sees himself as a husband.. Is he the stern and sturdy type??? Or sweet and sensitive?? Well, why do I need to know this.. This will help me to know what to expect from him hehe


Who do you see yourself in ten years??

Ok~ This question seems simple but I consider this quite important too.. I really hold this saying

"If you fail to plan, you actually plan to fail"

So it's really important for me to know to where he is leading his life to. Because it is almost always positive when someone has a purpose or aim in his doings and dealings.. It's like if you have the purpose, then you'll have a guide that directs you there rather than just wonder around without knowing where you are getting at at the end.. Afterall, even man is given purpose by Allah in this world which is to become His vicegerent..


Will you consider my dreams and wants??

Women also have dreams that they want to achieve. There are some husbands who neglect the dreams of their wives and they doesn't realize that they are actually hindering their wives' fullest potentials.

There's this one story about a man who married a best student of one of the world's eminent university. He forbids her from having a job and wanted her to focus on the household. A friend asked him "Why did you do that, you have the best student as a wife!" He answered "Look at what I got now.. I got 10 very successful children"


Well, I respect that the guy is content with that achievement. Maybe that's his definition of full utilization of his wife's gifts. But in a different point of view, if he'd let his wife, lets say, become a teacher somewhere, she might have produced more than just 10 successful individuals who are very useful in the developmet of the ummah~

So0o0o0, I say I rather find someone who could support me in developing my potentials.. Well if your wife is contributing to the ummah due to your love, understanding and support, surely you'll also be rewarded for that since you are the great man who stands by her.. And I have this belief, that if you really cherish your spouse, then you'll work things out to achieve what matters to both of you.. Afterall, you have the rest of your life to do that heee

Hehe I guess that's enough for now.. These are the top questions that I think important..

Hurm recently someone wrote this on my fb wall

"When will gg be in a relationship again"

and I've been receiveing critics like "jual mahal sangat" "suke dewa2 je" haha not offended at all...

Well.. It's not that I'm "jual mahal sangat" but I think it's my right to choose whom I think right for me and whom I can live with for the rest of my life.. I'm not searching for someone who is too perfect or too ideal of a man.. Just someone who I am comfortable and compatible with.. Preferably someone who have the same interest as me so that we could do a lot of things that we enjoy together.. Someone whose flaws is something that I could cope with and handle.. And most importantly someone that have the magic to wash my sorrows away and make me smile (^^)


Owh yeah.. religion is also important but I don't really expect he would be someone who knows everything.. It'll be just fine if he's the type who knows the basics and never stop learning to improve heeee~ X memilih sangat pon kan???? hehe

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