Soaring~ HIgh~

I'm standing on the edge of a familiar cliff. Surrounded by a familiar landscape. I always love it up here..


In the morning, I'm the first to see the tangerine trace of sunlight from the east. I watch anxiously as the morning sunlight creeps to dissolve every trace of darkness. A fairly stiff breeze occasionally blow, swaying the branches of willow trees that stood below me. I would close my eyes and listen close to the sound of leaves touching each other as the wind blows, listen close to the chirping of birds and inhale deep the whiff of lush greenery.. Serene~


At night, the surrounding glow white in the moonlight. Sometimes the shadows cast by the moonlight frightened me; they produce intimidating shapes that seems to be waiting to strike when I'm not looking. Again I close my eyes, sitting still, knees touching my chest, arms wrapped around my knees. My mind goes back to when there was daylight, when things around me was crystal clear. I reminded myself of the beauty that surrounds me when there was light.. Fear dissipates into thin air...

I discovered this place years ago but I'd left. A year ago, I arrived at this very same place and left again. This year I'm standing here again on this cliff.. The view has always been perfect from up here.; never cease to make me feel that I belong here. Despite of all that, I always leave in the end.


Right now, I can see dark clouds on the horizon. Arms spread now, trying to reckon which way the wind is blowing.. I just can't tell.. Another reason to leave again. I don't want to be drenched by the rain. But that's not the only reason to leave.. I don't know whether I haven't been vigilant in the past but I'm starting to notice flaws in this place where I always seek for tranquility..


Now I'm going to soar into the sky and leave again.. Maybe I will return or maybe I'll find some other place where I truly belong :)

Read More

Salah sangka~ (-_-")

This has been somewhat mind-boggling.. I think it's a self-guilt kind of feeling.. Because of me being so judgemental...

I've this mind-setting that sort of spark out of nowhere after I finished my study. Like I said before, I've been living in a 'regulated' world since I was 13. In school, our daily activities were scheduled to balance between study, religion and co-curricular activities. And in UIA, the islamic aura just seem to emanate from every corner of the university.

So back to my mind-setting.. I've set my mind not to be too freaked out if any of my friends don't rise from their seats to perform prayers during our hangouts. I also set my mind not to wear that awkward look on my face as I slide back into my seat after performing my prayers.. Again, I emphasize here that I don't know where that kind of mind-setting come from. In that kind of situation, I was actually in between not wanting them to feel uncomfortable and not wanting them to have the impression that I think I'm slightly better than them. You know what I mean?? Like, I'm totally aware that we are grown ups who are free to decide whether or not to observe our obligation as Muslims. But, yes, I'll definitely be happier if all of us rise to perform prayers.

So, what's this thing about salah sangka... Okay, I feel guilty already right now~ (-_-")

Well, it was this one very fine day in a shopping complex.. I was gazing rather dreamily at the direction of the entrance from afar; waiting for a friend to appear behind the automated glass door. Then when he did appear, he appeared with someone else. Being slightly short sighted, I could only guess who's the other person was; from the shape of his figures since I can't make out his face from that distance. And here comes the part that makes me feel guilty... You know what popped out in my mind when the view of this other person became clearer and I found out that my guess was right...

"Eyh?? X kan la dia jumpa dia ni d surau?"

But I'd kept it to myself until later that evening when my friend and I were alone again. I asked the details of how he'd met our friend. They bumped into each other when my friend was about to leave the surau. That time our friend was about to enter the surau. (Confusing nya la my friend, our friend nih)


I don't know.. I feel terrible for thinking that way. To think of it, who am I to judge him that way? That's why we shouldn't bother thinking of another person's connection with God because the outward look is only superficial. It's the inside that matters most which is only Allah who knows~

Sorry dude~

Read More

A sky full of lighters~

A confiscated precious item :p

Read More